Could Loneliness Be Teaching Us Something?

Well…

Yeah.

Sometimes I do feel lonely.

Quite often, actually.

Not because I don’t have people in my life.

I do.

I have people who love me, who care about me, who check in on me.

And yet…

There are days when I feel like there’s nobody to talk to.

Nobody to share the little things with.

The random thoughts.

The silly observations.

The kind of conversations that don’t really have a purpose.

And then I realised…

I’m not the only one.

I’ve heard so many people say they feel lonely, even when they’re surrounded by hundreds of people.

Which made me wonder…

Is loneliness really about being alone?

Or is it about something else entirely?

Sometimes I think…

Is it always necessary to be around people?

Because the moment we expect someone else to fill that space, we also begin expecting them to understand us.

To know what’s bothering us without us saying a word.

To read our minds.

To somehow become responsible for our happiness.

And that’s a lot to expect from another human being.

Then another question crossed my mind.

Why do we actually feel lonely?

Do we feel like something is missing?

Or are we searching for something we can’t quite put into words?

Maybe we’re looking for meaning.

Maybe we’re trying to understand who we are becoming.

Or maybe this is what everyone calls a midlife crisis.

If that’s true…

Then I think I’ve been having one for the longest time.

I don’t know if loneliness is a search for something.

But I do know that, after a while, it quietly changes you.

It asks you to spend more time with yourself.

To sit with your own thoughts.

To look back.

To look within.

To notice parts of yourself you’ve been too busy to meet.

And perhaps that’s where loneliness slowly becomes solitude.

Loneliness feels like waiting for someone to arrive.

Solitude feels like finally enjoying your own company.

One feels empty.

The other feels peaceful.

Maybe the difference isn’t whether we’re alone.

Maybe it’s whether we’ve learned to be comfortable with ourselves.

I don’t think the answer to loneliness is always finding more people.

Sometimes, it’s finding yourself.

Learning what brings you joy without needing an audience.

Discovering that silence doesn’t always have to be filled.

And realising that your own company can be enough.

Maybe we should spend a little more time with ourselves than we do searching for other people.

Maybe we should expect more from ourselves than we expect from others.

Because at the end of the day…

No one else is responsible for our happiness.

No one else can make our choices for us.

The longest relationship we’ll ever have is with ourselves.

Perhaps that’s the one we should start investing in the most.

Anindita Rath
@scrambledwriter

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